January - 2016

Vancouver Counselling

Dating: A Struggle or a Pleasure?

Dating: A Struggle or a Pleasure?

Dating is hard. It’s a struggle. It’s so much work. These are phrases that often come out of my mouth, partly because I live with chronic pain and illness, which can complicate things quite a bit, and partly because meeting someone special seems hard, health condition or not. When hear myself say that dating is a struggle, I start to feel powerless over the process. When I listen to myself talk about how much more complicated it is to date when you have a health condition, I

You Have the Power to Change Your Thoughts

You Have the Power to Change Your Thoughts

Thought Series Part 8 Today brings us to the end of the thought series. Thank you for joining me in this mind exploration process. I've enjoyed sharing it with you and I hope you’ve picked up some helpful information. To wrap up, I’d like to show you the effect your new, positive, useful, and valid thought has on your emotions, physiology, and behaviour because it can help to see why it’s worth doing this work. I used the following thought for the ANT process: ANT: I am going

How to Change Your Negative Thoughts

How to Change Your Negative Thoughts

Thought Series Part 7 Today is the day we kick out the automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) and replace them with truly valid and useful thoughts! To start, a little background on this exercise: The more we think a thought, the easier it becomes for our brain to think it. So if you have ANTs frequently, it becomes easier and easier for your brain to have these thoughts. When you start changing your thoughts – replacing an ANT with a new, more empowering statement each time you

Five Steps for Dealing with Red Flags

Five Steps for Dealing with Red Flags

Have you ever met a new guy, gotten to know him, felt really good about the blossoming relationship, and then suddenly he said, did, or told you about something that made you think, “Uh oh, why did he have to go and say/do/tell me that?!”? I can't even begin to count the number of times this has happened to me. Let me tell you about the most recent occurence: A couple of weeks ago, I went out on a date with a new man, let’s call him Doug. I really like Doug. He's friendly, wi

Are Your Thoughts Useful?

Are Your Thoughts Useful?

Thought Series Part 6 We’re getting close to completing some life-changing work! Today I’m going to be sharing the last step before we actually start to transform our automatic negative thoughts ("ANTs") into thoughts that are more helpful, supportive and encouraging. But first, a quick summary of what we’ve covered so far. The Thought Series So Far Step 1: Identifying ANTS Step 2: Identifying the Emotions That Arise When You Have an ANT Step 3: Recognizing the Physiological

Are Your Thoughts Valid?

Are Your Thoughts Valid?

Thought Series Part 5 We’re at the halfway point of my thought series and so far we’ve covered a lot. What have your learned about your thoughts? Are you noticing anything you’d like to change about the way you think? We’re getting closer to the step where we change our automatic negative thoughts (“ANTs”) into more helpful ones, but first we have just a couple of quick questions to answer. Today we’re going to be looking at the validity of our ANTS. But first, a brief summar

A Wrench in my Dating Plans

A Wrench in my Dating Plans

Last week I had an awesome date planned with a great guy. We were going to meet at a sports bar and watch an NFL playoff game. Anyone who knows me knows I love watching football. I even watch the pre-game shows and post-game analyses. Since I don’t often get the chance to watch games with others who love and understand football, I was really excited for this date. Not to mention the guy I was meeting is cute, funny, and down-to-earth. It had been a while since I’d been excite

How Deeply do Your Thoughts Impact Your Behaviour?

How Deeply do Your Thoughts Impact Your Behaviour?

Thought Series Part 4 Welcome to part four to my January Thought Series! Thank you for joining me in this process of identifying and eliminating our negative thoughts. This first part of the series focuses on becoming aware of just how much even one negative thought can affect us, emotionally, physiologically and behaviourally. When you break it down, like we are, it’s pretty damn amazing. The Thought Series So Far So far we’ve covered the first three steps involved in chang

How Do Your Thoughts Affect Your Body?

How Do Your Thoughts Affect Your Body?

Thought Series Part 3 Are you aware of how your thoughts impact your body and your physiology? Most of us are not conscious of the extent to which our thoughts can influence our bodies’ functions. It’s pretty fascinating how much power our thoughts have, not just over our emotions but also over our bodies. In today’s post we’re going to explore how your thoughts impact your physiology. Physiology: the branch of biology that deals with the normal functions of living organisms

The Importance of Touch

The Importance of Touch

On Fridays I post about dating and relationships. And in a roundabout way, today's post is about dating. It's about your physical needs, and how to meet them when you are single. Let's rewind a bit. Years ago, I used to go to a massage therapist who firmly believed that that touch is a basic human need. She said that if you were single and not in a physical relationship, it was important to make sure that you were experiencing skin-to-skin touch from another human being on a

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Who Are You? Illness and Identity.

Who Are You? Illness and Identity.

Chronic Health Conditions: Curing vs. Managing

Chronic Health Conditions: Curing vs. Managing

Secrets of a Woman With Chronic Pain

Secrets of a Woman With Chronic Pain

Introducing Aches, Pains, and Love

Introducing Aches, Pains, and Love

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